Mark

I'm going to write this down because I think of it often and it was one of the better experiences of my lifetime, even though I feel writing it down could ruin it because it sort of takes it out of the aether.  I need some sort of place to park this memory.  This great moment came from a sad event, but ultimately I guess this is what made it so impactful.

A friend and pillar of the local music community passed away a couple years ago, and a gathering was held in his honor at a venue known for its support of local music.  Our local music scene has a very storied past and everyone was there.  Everyone loved this guy.  We all remembered our friend with short stories and tributes that each of us, in turn, told from the lone mic on the stage, standing next to his guitar that had a spotlight on it.

My story was about meeting him 5,000 miles away from home, with a few others of us from the hometown.  The story was essentially about feeling very much at home while being so far away from it, and how he was an instrumental part of that moment.  

I know everyone, no matter how seasoned, gets a little nervous before speaking in front of a crowd, and I certainly did, too.  But here's the thing; I spoke with ease.  It was seamless.  The story had a beginning, middle, and end, and it had anecdotes.  I had a point.  I said exactly what I wanted to say and was never lost.  It was fully sincere and came off exactly as I wanted.  What happened next was what made it one of the greatest moments of my life.

After I said my thank you and left the stage, the room echoed with heartfelt applause.  As I made my way off the stage and back through the crowd, people I didn't know were patting me on the back and saying "Good speech".  I got back to my spot and one of the friends I had been standing with leaned over and said "That was a good story."  Cripes.  I really connected.  In the time that I was working my way back to my spot, with the applause still going, my closest friend in the music community was making his way to the stage to say a few short words, and he's a beloved member of the community that people were happy to see and the applause only increased when he stepped on to the stage.  He was brief and awesome.  When he returned he told me that he wasn't going to say anything but I had inspired him and he wanted to follow me.  We do play in a duo together so I was happy for the pairing.

When everyone who wanted to speak had finished, we returned to mingling around the room and people whom I'd never met were engaging in conversation with me.  People who hadn't previously paid me much attention were reaching out.  A longtime, popular local musician struck up a conversation with me, the bar owner told me he appreciated my story, a local music reporter just randomly started telling me his life story, another stranger started talking about her guitar to me...  For just a brief moment I became a guy everyone wanted to talk to.  Obviously my story really tapped into the love everyone had for this musician.  It was a great feeling.

But here's the real thing; my speech was memorized.  Maybe not word-for-word, but it was mapped out and sometimes directly quoted.  About a week before this memorial service, I took the time to write down the story I remembered about our friend, and all the time I needed to spend searching for the right word or the best phrase I had already invested, in private, a week ago.  I wasn't up there reading off a prompter or index cards, but I had organized my thoughts, and I know that made the difference.  We all loved Mark. He really was a pillar of the local community, and I'm so glad that his memorial service evolved into one of the most warm and impactful moments of my life.  Never been to any other service that felt so much like a celebration of someone's life and contribution, and this is where Mark's memory sits.  Thanks, friend.