Try, Try Again

 Keep plugging away!  You may have to go through an awful lot of noes to get to a yes.  Here’s a real world example for you.

Imagine a local company has posted a job, and you feel the description fits you to a T.  It encompasses three fields in which you are not only trained and experienced, but also have a genuine interest in.  You send a résumé posthaste.

A couple of quiet weeks later you get a rejection e-mail. This may confuse you but that’s fine. Just gotta get back up on that horse.

Lo and behold, about 18 months later the same job is posted.  You don’t give up!  Go again!  Submit another résumé!  This time mention that you are trying again because you are quite certain the job description fits you to a T.  It isn’t some kind of lark; this is a great match and you really think we need to meet.

Lo and behold, just a few days later, you are rejected once again.  This might be even harder to believe.  It could make you bitter, and that’s natural.  But you can learn from this.  Remember the great Nelson Mandella and his quote about how he only ever succeeds or learns.  Still, it’s understandable if you want to be a little upset.  We can’t overlook that part of the process.  Just don’t let it keep you down.

Lo and behold, TWO full years after that, the job is listed again!  Just because something appears gone doesn’t mean it’s gone forever.  We definitely have learned something here.

So you apply again, and this time you really tweak your résumé.  Taking everything you learned from the past two experiences, you really dial this one in.

Two silent and fairly long weeks pass, but then you find out you know someone who knows someone at the company!  An IN!  This is how things get done.  A phone call is made and your name is specifically mentioned.  Lo and behold, the very next day you are invited to a ½ hour video interview!

The very definition of perseverance!  I’ve always loved that book title “Getting To Yes”.  I’m sure it’s a fairly repulsive read, but the title has a lot of truth to it.  Almost reflexively, the world is a giant wall of “No” but there’s usually a “Yes” somewhere under that veneer.  The “No” is just human nature. Maybe a protective trait.  “Yes” almost always exists. You just need to find a way in.

Anyway they sent the rejection e-mail less than 24 hours after my interview.  Of course we can’t all win.

Buy a Crane

 The church burned.  No one was hurt, but the roof had caved in the area above the crypt for the Bishops.  A 15-foot statue of St. Anne remained atop the roof, but the area around it had been compromised and the statue had to be removed.  Bill owned a rigging company.  He volunteered to do the job.  Scully, then just an officer, was assigned the detail by his Chief. "There's gonna be a lot of emotional people there and I need someone I can count on."  A crowd of almost 400 people, all pretty emotional, had gathered to watch.  Bill lowered himself onto the two-square-foot patch of good roof near the base of the statue.  He loosened all 18 bolts, then hooked the strap around the arm and gave the spiraling finger signal to hoist away.  As the statue cleared the bolts, he looked down at Scully and gave a salute.  Scully took his hat off and placed it over his badge.  A cadre of photographers didn't miss the opportunity and Scully immediately went 1972's version of viral.

Bill died only a few years later.  A crane loaded onto his semi-trailer had shifted as he navigated a sharp on-ramp to the interstate.  He was impaled.  Scully eventually became Chief.

Yesterday I made a macaroni and cheese.  I don't even really like macaroni and cheese.

The Washington Generals

I'm pretty sick of lessons.  You can take a lesson from each defeat, but if you try, try again and only come up with lessons, what have you got?  I'm afraid you have to win in there once or twice.  Full disclosure: you actually have to win quite a few more times than that.  You just can't have fallen on your face a thousand times and come up being proud of how much you've learned.

I spent four seasons as an assistant coach for a school softball team.  A couple of those seasons went winless.  That was around 30 games in a row without a win - most times getting completely blown out.  One season had one win.  For the final season, I helped build a batting cage, got a generator so we could run the pitching machine outside, gathered more equipment for batting training, and went out there every day before practice to set it all up.  I also took slo-mo video of every player's swing so the coaches could help pinpoint ways to improve.  I kept stats at every game and offered advice on the lineup.  With our head coach being a Long Island native, I found out how they ran practices at Hofstra and got him to follow that model.

That season had three wins.  One of those wins was a playoff game, which the school hadn't seen since sometime in the 1970's.  The season still had plenty of blowouts.  My takeaway from it all is definitely not how much I learned.  Anything I learned about defeat, I learned within the first few games of the first season.  There are some useful things to take from defeat, but it's really not that complicated.

And coming up with three wins in a season doesn't suddenly negate all the defeat.  It's really not that simple.  There's only so much learning and character building a person needs to do.  Eventually you have to parlay it, otherwise it's pretty worthless.

Ode To Joy

 It’s fine.  Okay, not fine, but I’ve calmed myself down considerably.  I was able to color in a few details about what went so terribly wrong.  It’s really the same old adage about being careful where you hitch your wagon.

I’m not going to shed light on the details but I’ll say I encountered at least two people who didn’t like me (that happens all the time) and these were people that other people were very motivated to keep happy.  Quietly, not everyone thinks the decision made sense. 

I’ll only add that if I had not been fired, the photo job would have been finished three weeks ago.  As of now the finish date is still at least three weeks out.

What I know for sure is that all these ridiculous shenanigans completely killed the fun. I think the majority of people involved would agree on that.  Great work, people.

Yes, I See That It Is Dark

 I took this portrait of a gentleman who wrote a science fiction novel.*

*no not really but it looks that way and maybe the fact that I think so is what makes me a hack.

½

Dear Diary,

I suppose it could not have been the Web Mistress who was responsible for my firing.  Even though she name-dropped my replacement while I was still doing the job and I could see it coming a mile away, it is possible that the web steering committee at the office decided (not necessarily unanimously) they wanted a so-called professional. Oh - am I still on about this?  YOU BET.

Portraiture is an emotional experience for a lot of people.  A lot of people hate to have their picture taken and they are very quick to admit that.  I've taken portraits of people who are convinced they have a "good" side, people who are sure they are the least photogenic person in the history of people ("...and I know everyone says they aren't photogenic but I really am not photogenic"), people who smile confidently, and people who, for years, have simply refused to have their portrait taken.  Most people announce "I hate having my picture taken" and that's how we start the session.  All that does to me is quietly inspire me to give them the best portrait they've ever had. 

While I've surprised a few of these people over the years with a result that actually pleased them (and I can tell you that's a real moment seeing people decide maybe for the first time that they don't look so bad after all) there have been some who try and try again and never seem too enthused about the result.  I suppose it's important not to underestimate this lot.

The people who never seem too enthused about the result tend to be the people who are only capable of one pose no matter how much you try to coax something else out of them.  Some people smile only out of half of their face.  Have you ever had to ask an adult, "Can you please try smiling with both sides of your mouth?"  That's either there or it isn't.  Some people have a toothy smile, and some remain tight lipped.  I've asked the tight-lippers to show some teeth.  Some oblige. Some refuse. Some just can't do it naturally.  It doesn't always work, and it isn't always the look people want.  The photographic skill is in finding a place between what looks good and what comes naturally, and the bottom line is that the things that come naturally to you define who you are.  It's how you comport yourself.  Ever see a photo of Hitler with an ebullient grin?  Maybe that was a bad example.

People also, and this one is hard to believe until you've seen it, light up differently.  I can have everything set perfectly for one person, and then the next person stands in the same exact spot and everything is wrong.  Nothing works.  The eyes that were cheerfully accented with catch light now appear sunken.  The shadows on the face are now harsh.  The background is brighter or darker because the overall exposure has changed.  Everything is a complete do-over.  These are probably the people on the steering committee.  Also, good luck to the next guy photographing these people (except not really good luck.)

Other people stand in front of the camera and everything suddenly works.  Lighting is even and soft.  The smile (whatever it may be) is natural.  I've seen this happen with people of all different physical descriptions.  It could be anyone.  One thing I've noticed is that you really can't tell how someone is going to light up until you get them in front of the lens.

There are tutorials and instructions all over the internet to help with the many issues you'll encounter when taking portraits... if you know enough to recognize the issues in the first place.  That's half the battle.  

Not sure what the other half is.

The Peter Principle

Boy, that's an unfortunate name.

Irregardless, the Peter Principle says that you'll be promoted to the level of your incompetence.  It suggests that as long as you continue to excel, you'll advance.  That means once you stop excelling, you'll stop advancing.  That means eventually you'll land on the thing you don't excel at, and that's where you shall stay my friend.  

It sort of implies that everyone who works at the highest level in any department is incompetent, but the idea does come from a work of satire, so it isn't meant as gospel, but it does seem to have a grain of truth.  

If that grain of truth exists, it tells me I wasn't quite good enough to finish the photo job I was just ranting about in a previous post.  Oh - am I still going on about that?  YOU BET.  It says that my level of competence stops short of portraiture, which as I said, is kind of hard to explain after eight years of continually getting asked to do the job, and matching the look established by the previous "professional" photographer so they would all appear seamless.  It says that I should never have been selected to take any of these photos in the first place.

It also says that the guy who got the job probably sucks at it, too.  Except in his case it doesn't matter.

Imposter Syndrome!

 The latest in the armchair psychology craze, this term describes the condition whereby successful people - that is, people already doing the job, worry they may not actually have what it takes.  The nagging feeling that someone, at any moment, will gently tap them on the shoulder and say, "You've been found out.  I'm afraid it's time for you to go."

What's the term for when you don't get the job to begin with?

Anyway, based on the number of successful people who suffer from this fear, I bet that tap on the shoulder must be one of the worst things anyone could experience.