Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Dear Old People

Dear Old People,

The freezer just freezes things. It doesn't stop time. You actually can't just put anything in the freezer and expect that it will come out good as new. If your goal is simply to eat food that doesn't have mold on it, the freeze-storage technique will help, but some foods don't take well this method of preservation. Donuts are a good example.

I know it's that much less for you to have to deal with on, say, Thanksgiving, but cooking the turkey the day before and then just reheating it for the holiday doesn't count. Consider setting your sites a little higher.

Yes, there are myriad ways to accomplish the task of just getting the food down the collective holiday gullet, but for that matter we may as well just get together and have a sandwich. If it has in fact come to that, I think I'll probably pass on the whole thing as I had a sammich just yesterday, thanks.

My guess is that when today's oldsters first saw the freezer, their first thought was, "Oh, snap! All the food I just bought will last forever!" Not sure what they did 'afore that.

Hey, look. Kitty wants to come in.

Sorry, Kitty. This isn't your house.

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