Do Not Swallow

Yeah, I partook of a little "Black Friday" mayhem. Well, just like three stores, actually. I still don't understand the whole philosophy. Most places offer insane discounts on extremely limited quantities of certain products, and they literally require that you camp out in order to get the discount. Those deeply discounted items are sold out within minutes and the rest of the day is the usual stuff at regular prices. Why did you ask people to camp out? I honestly am not getting the concept. Perhaps I am not an advanced shopper.

Case in point: I walk into a store (not a store that I chose) which seems to me to be filled wall-to-wall with utterly useless junk; a veritable cornicopia of injection-molded plastic items, possibly with some kind of light inside them or something. A store filled with things that basically just take up space until they break. Some of them are even broken already, which is nice because you can take it home and throw it out right away, thereby saving you a step.

Regardless, this store is also packed wall-to-wall with people evidently looking to buy this stuff. This sort of thing makes my head almost literally spin just trying to figure out what's happening here. For example:

Most of these people look like they may not have much money. Is this what you want to spend it on?

Who is the genius that knew these folks were out there and rounded up all this shit to sell to them?

These type of folk... what would they do if they came into like $50 million? Would they even know where to begin?

Who's to say how anyone should spend their money? Maybe some of these people have pretty mediocre jobs that they just kind of grind away at, and they enjoy spending their presumedly hard-earned money on things like this because things like this amuse them.

Is this the kind of shit people are getting themselves into all kinds of credit card debt over?

Who is the genius that knew these folks were out there and rounded up all this shit to sell to them?

If this store burned to the ground tomorrow and everything in it was destroyed, would anyone miss any of it?

Who is the freakin' genius that knew these folks were out there and rounded up all this shit to sell to them?!?!

Maybe I can sum it all up like this: If I lived to be a thousand, I would not guess that a "product", like the one pictured below, would even be considered something to sell, yet there were at least six people swarming around these when I walked in.



I did not swallow the novelty egg, but the store still managed to make me feel dumb.